Maybe you didn't have the popularity you deserved in high school. All of that can change in college--you can be who you were meant to be! It all depends on YOU. I was shy in high school and didn't want to be that person in college. Read on to see how I changed that.
MAKING FRIENDS
My first year of college was at a local school very close to home. I knew many of the people that were there already, so that was comforting. I also found that the dynamics changed. Cliques no longer existed. I became friends with people that I never talked to in high school. It made being "stuck" in my hometown more bearable with some new friends, knowing we were all in the same boat.
The second year of college I moved over three hours away to a university where I didn't know a soul (except for my boyfriend). Since no one knew me, I could be whomever I wanted. I supplied myself with confidence and made friends. I was no longer the shy girl!
SOCIAL LIFE
The easiest way to make friends, other than your new roommate, is to talk to the people in your classes! Chances are they are feeling the same way you are--a little nervous and insecure. If you're taking a class that's required of your major/course of study, you already have something in common with them and you will probably have more classes with them. Join or form a study group.
Check the campus bulletin board or emails for social events and GO TO THEM. Sure dances in high school were lame, but it's not that way in college! There are plenty of events to attend. Go to your school's sporting events--even if football isn't your thing. You'll meet friends and maybe even make plans for after the game. And no, you don't have to drink to have a good time.
Find out where students hang out. Try the local coffee shop, a popular restaurant or bar. Visit your common area in your dorm/residence hall. Attend those dorm meetings! Talk to your RA for great advice. She already knows the students on your hall and can introduce you to people. Many people join a sorority or fraternity and make lifelong friends that way.
ROOMMATES
My roommates that year were all basketball players and were gone often. I felt like we had nothing in common. I learned how to look past our differences and find some commonalities. This article lists lots of ways to deal with roommates and how to do a search for them! I'm super close with my college friends to this day. I did have some crazy ones though!
Many colleges allow you to contact your new roommate(s) ahead of time. This is a great way to get to know each other before school starts, so it's not a total shock. You both can discuss who's bringing what (you don't need 2 microwaves, for example) to the dorm room.
Luckily, I was able to make great friends out of my roommates and secured that we would all room together the next year. Yet another way to combat the awkwardness of making new friends.
Don't expect people to come to you to make friends. Sure a huge campus can be intimidating, but you aren't alone! Think of all the others that feel just like you. Making friends takes just a little bit of effort. Of anyone who complains that she hated college/had no friends, I always ask if she ever attended anything on campus. And almost always, I get a NO. My point has been proven.
FRESHMEN, BEWARE
Remember how I talked about being whomever you want to be? This can backfire if you're not careful. Don't let your actions at that first party dictate your reputation for the next four years. See my post from yesterday about being safe!
Want even more help? College Fashion has a great article for incoming freshmen!
How did you make friends in university/college? Any advice, tips, or questions for Elle?
MAKING FRIENDS
My first year of college was at a local school very close to home. I knew many of the people that were there already, so that was comforting. I also found that the dynamics changed. Cliques no longer existed. I became friends with people that I never talked to in high school. It made being "stuck" in my hometown more bearable with some new friends, knowing we were all in the same boat.
The second year of college I moved over three hours away to a university where I didn't know a soul (except for my boyfriend). Since no one knew me, I could be whomever I wanted. I supplied myself with confidence and made friends. I was no longer the shy girl!
SOCIAL LIFE
The easiest way to make friends, other than your new roommate, is to talk to the people in your classes! Chances are they are feeling the same way you are--a little nervous and insecure. If you're taking a class that's required of your major/course of study, you already have something in common with them and you will probably have more classes with them. Join or form a study group.
Check the campus bulletin board or emails for social events and GO TO THEM. Sure dances in high school were lame, but it's not that way in college! There are plenty of events to attend. Go to your school's sporting events--even if football isn't your thing. You'll meet friends and maybe even make plans for after the game. And no, you don't have to drink to have a good time.
Find out where students hang out. Try the local coffee shop, a popular restaurant or bar. Visit your common area in your dorm/residence hall. Attend those dorm meetings! Talk to your RA for great advice. She already knows the students on your hall and can introduce you to people. Many people join a sorority or fraternity and make lifelong friends that way.
ROOMMATES
My roommates that year were all basketball players and were gone often. I felt like we had nothing in common. I learned how to look past our differences and find some commonalities. This article lists lots of ways to deal with roommates and how to do a search for them! I'm super close with my college friends to this day. I did have some crazy ones though!
Many colleges allow you to contact your new roommate(s) ahead of time. This is a great way to get to know each other before school starts, so it's not a total shock. You both can discuss who's bringing what (you don't need 2 microwaves, for example) to the dorm room.
Luckily, I was able to make great friends out of my roommates and secured that we would all room together the next year. Yet another way to combat the awkwardness of making new friends.
Don't expect people to come to you to make friends. Sure a huge campus can be intimidating, but you aren't alone! Think of all the others that feel just like you. Making friends takes just a little bit of effort. Of anyone who complains that she hated college/had no friends, I always ask if she ever attended anything on campus. And almost always, I get a NO. My point has been proven.
FRESHMEN, BEWARE
Remember how I talked about being whomever you want to be? This can backfire if you're not careful. Don't let your actions at that first party dictate your reputation for the next four years. See my post from yesterday about being safe!
Want even more help? College Fashion has a great article for incoming freshmen!
How did you make friends in university/college? Any advice, tips, or questions for Elle?
great advice! yeah, so far i have found that college is a lot different than high school. no bullying or any of that..most people seem more mature than that and it's more about school than dealing with random crap you find in high school. good post!!
ReplyDeleteE - you always write such informative posts - great advice! You are taking me back!
ReplyDeleteGreat advice!
ReplyDeleteBecca
The best advice I have is learn to do things by yourself. Especially your freshman year. I went to college in NYC and a lot of the people I knew would often bail on plans. I learned pretty quickly that I wasn't going to sulk in my dorm room.
ReplyDelete