1.15.2014

On Why I Take Selfies, And 3 More Beauty Things I'm Not Apologizing For

Do you ever get nervous about clicking "publish" on a blog post? That's me today. I was tagged by Vero Says to talk about those beauty things I won't apologize for any longer. It started off light-hearted but got a little serious. I have butterflies over posting this. Here goes:

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1--My Beauty Collection--I love looking at your shoes, bags, watches, etc, but I have no desire to collect them. More nail polish and eyeshadow palettes than I'll ever use? Yes, come to Mama.

2--Not Filling in My Brows--Slowly, but surely, the world is leaving the over-plucked brows behind and is starting to fill them in. But I rarely do it--sometimes for photos, but I just don't like the look on me. I think they're full enough already!

3--Washing My Hair Weekly--Sounds gross, right? I hear it ALL the time. But I have the driest, frizziest hair known to (wo)man. I have no idea where I get this hair from, but I know it gets worse if I wash it more than twice a week. Trust me on this.

4--Selfies--These have such a negative connotation. You must be conceited if you post them, right? I lose followers whenever I post a pic of myself. But I don't see it as conceited when I post them. I see it as a victory:

From about 5th grade through now, people have felt the need in person (and online) to tell me how unattractive I am. And up until recently, I believed them. I've always been very shy and introverted due to my lack of looks. If you're quiet, maybe no one will notice you, or make fun of you. I've even bent over backwards to be excessively nice to people who didn't deserve my friendship, in the hopes of having friends, because ugly people don't have friends and are forever alone. I didn't want that to be me.

For the first year of my blog I didn't post pictures of myself, because who would take beauty advice from an ugly girl? Even one who really knows what she's talking about? Well, I was finally called out on it by a former blogger and she was right: I had to post pictures of myself. I had to prove I was real. I had to reveal more of myself, which is still really hard, but a necessity in growing a blog.

But over the past few months, the latter part of last year, I just decided to stop thinking that way. I'll never be attractive to everyone. Impossible. Even though I know I am great person, there will still be people I've never met who hate me and my blog (I'll never understand that). I'll still have drunken strangers yell out how unattractive I am or call me fat. I'll still have old ladies at Target tell me I need a nose job (true story). I'll still have anonymous trolls tell me I'm the grossest, ugliest creature with a bad blog. It stings less every time.

Are there things I would change? Absolutely. Even the girl you'd deem "most beautiful" could find a flaw in herself. But today, I'm proud of myself. I'm 37. I'm silly. I talk in accents or sing for no reason. I'm great with kids. I dance while I'm driving. I lost 40 pounds (so far!) this past year. I'm really nice, loving, and very patient. And I'm pretty. I'm finally pretty.

And that's why I take selfies.

116 comments:

  1. Elle, this was absolutely AMAZING. I can't believe people have been this cruel to you, or that a complete stranger would tell you to get a nose job. You really are BEAUTIFUL, and I'm so glad that you know that now! Keep posting those selfies. They're my favorite part of your Instagram feed, and they inspire me to try harder with makeup and beauty. You have absolutely nothing to be afraid of, and I admire your courage!

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  2. I absolutely love this post. As a shy, quiet girl for most of my life I totally understand the way you feel. Congrats on not being sorry any more - it's a great way to value yourself more and love yourself more. I sort of always felt the need to be "normal" and fit in. Not stand out. Until recently, I decided to forget about all of the criticism I would receive for quitting a safe job and made the decision to work towards running my jewelry business and blogging for a living. Plus I dip dyed my hair purple again as a statement that I won't go back to an office job any time soon. Couldn't be happier :)

    P.S. I take selfies too and love every minute of it even though I have tons of insecurities.

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  3. You are gorgeous - and courageous, too. I think so many of us have dealt with what you've experienced. I am 36 and through my blog have realized that I do have a right to enjoy clothes and all the girly things that I thought could only be used by "pretty" girls. It's unfortunate that today, picking on other people's supposed "imperfections" and voicing thoughtless, mean judgments is so often accepted.

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  4. I know how you feel. I have google my blog and find a lot of hate. Also had a good blog friend tell me about a site that was hating on me. Man I was so upset. That my blogger friend felt bad about it. After I got over it I kept blogging.

    There a lady that i know over here in Germany how tell me my clothes are ugly and other mean things. I just talk to her no more .

    Elle you are very beautiful. Try and not that the meanie get to you. I know it can be hard at time and they do get to you. Some people are down right mean. I love you blog b/c of the fact you not a fashion blogger. I love all the tips and tricks you give out.

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  5. Elle you are AMAZING!! Take all the selfies you want, it doesn't define you as a person. Your personality and spirit does. You are beautiful and I take beauty advice from you an a regular basis lol!. I have to admit though I've been the same way most of my life. I almost never posted pics of me, selfies or not because I've always thought of myself as unattractive and nothing short of plastic surgery was going to make me look any better. The older I've gotten the more comfortable with myself I have gotten. I've even gone out a few times a month with OUT makeup. SHOCKER right?!! I say this all the time but just by having a blog and putting anything about yourself out there for the world to see is one of the most brave things you can do because it gives people a chance to say mean or nice things and tell you something you might or might not want to hear. If someone feels the need to say you aren't pretty or negative, don't bend over backward to be their friend, LOSE them fast as you can because it just goes to show how shallow they are. On a side note, I cannot believe you are in your 30's. If I just met you I'd assume you were mid twenties late twenties at most. And how are you not married yet? You are gorgeous! (Not that you need a man, you are awesome and independent) :) Love your blog and good luck to you, look forward to more of your posts in 2014!

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  6. One should never make apologies for what ever you love. You're beautiful inside and out. :) xx/Madison

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  7. You are seriously so gorgeous! And I love your selfies... That's prob why I stalk you on Instagram too! Ha! And I love all of your tips!!!!

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  8. Thanks for dropping by my blog :) It's sad the way people have made you feel but I'm glad you're happy with who you are now - good for you!

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  9. hmmm, I really don't get some people. Cleary they are saying mean things about you and to you because of their own issues, because what they're saying is so untrue. Like I wad just telling my friend yesterday ... I can't stand mean b*#tches!

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  10. I love sincere posts like this and I don't think any of the reasons you've mentioned are needed an apology. It's your world and it's a part of who you are, so if somebody doesn't like it, it's their problem. Just be. And be happy. There will always be people who love you exactly the way you are. x

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  11. Elle you are faboulous! Really, your words are inspiring and I think that you are more than pretty, I really like you!
    You are so sincere and it makes you more wonderful than anyone else <3
    Xxx

    Carolina

    www.the-world-c.blogspot.com

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  12. Love love love this post, Elle:) Keep posting those selfies, coz you look amazeballz!

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  13. one of the best posts i've read in awhile. i want to give you a standing ovation!!! the selfies part is brilliant and so well written and so TRUE.

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  14. you are beautiful elle. don't listen to any of those negative people! they have no place in your life. xo jillian - cornflake dreams

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  15. Oh my God. What an amazing post. I'm so glad you've been able to overcome the rudeness and sexism hurled your way. That's so sad people did that. People can be so stupid and cruel.

    I think you're beautiful. Both inside and out. You radiant warmth and friendliness. And you exude intelligence and skill. You're one of my favorite bloggers and that's a tough crowd to stand out in.

    This post deserves an award. As do you.

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  16. I can't believe that you've had to deal with all that negativity (and misogyny, really). I'm sorry that that's been your experience but really admire your attitude to it all, and your ability to transcend it. It's a mark of a truly (and justifiably) strong and confident person!

    Courtney ~ Sartorial Sidelines

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  17. I love this. Thank you for sharing.

    I can't believe you lose followers for posting selfies...so bizarre? I read blogs to learn about people's lives and beauty routines ans fashion and pictures help me feel connected in a way. You just can't please everyone.

    You are beautiful inside and out.


    Big Apple, Little Bites

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  18. You're crazy to think you are unattractive! But I know what you mean about the selfies, some people you can tell that they're obsessed with their looks (and those I don't like) but when its just a normal, cute girl who does it I don't mind at all.
    I didn't post photos of myself on my blog for the first few months either
    http://www.closet-fashionista.com/

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  19. Well, please never be crazy again to believe any of the shit that people say about your looks. You are gorgeous!! And who cares what others think!?! This is your life and you must live it the way that makes you happy or you will regret it one day & that's no fun. People always have something stupid to say, I just ignore them. I think you're really beautiful and have a stunning face!! I love lots of nail polishes and stuff like that, so much fun!! You just blog and post for yourself, this is you showing the world who you are & the world does not get to tell you who you are or who you should be!! Know you are beautiful & always remember!! Xxx

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  20. That is horrible that some people have said such cruel things to you, especially since it couldn't be further from the truth. You are gorgeous, both inside and out! Keep on posting those beautiful selfies!

    -Sharon
    The Tiny Heart

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  21. Bravo my dear. You have such a sweetness in your fave and your hair and eyes are always gorgeous. Most importantly, YOU have to love the way you look. I can't believe you've met such horrid people. All that matters is you hold up your head high and remember that you're pretty!

    xoxo,
    Chic 'n Cheap Living

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  22. people are wack. i really don't get the trolling or hating - why can't they just move on? but i'm glad that you're forgetting about those people and focusing on the positives which is everything about your blog. if people unfollow you because of whatever you post, byeeee!! see ya never!

    keep doing what you're doing, elle. you do awesome work up in here!

    kathy
    Vodka and Soda

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  23. I don't fill in my brows either, too much work and they are pretty full. Please tell me you are joking about #4, because i don't get it. You are beautiful. I am shy to and I know that can be taken the wrong way (i.e. stuck up or something) but it couldn't be further from the truth, as I am sure it is with you to.

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  24. I can't believe people would tell you that you're ugly. That's horrible! You're gorgeous and what a great outlook you have on it! I had people in high school make fun of me for not being attractive. It absolutely killed my self esteem (I still don't have super high self esteem and HATE pictures of myself). People are sooooo cruel :(

    Xo, Julia
    http://www.georgiapeachmommy.blogspot.com

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  25. WELL SAID !! Haters are Always Going To Hate !! Thats What They Do Best and Hide Behind A Computer . You are Beauitful and A Loving Person !

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  26. Awww, I love this post! I too was told constantly how unattractive/pale/frizzy haired I was growing up by random people. Which I will never understand. I still don't post pictures of myself on the blog much, I need to change that I know. You are gorgeous and I've gotten so many great tips from you, I adore your blog! I also don't wash my hair but about 2 times a week (hello, totally understand the dry part, it just works for my hair type). I'm proud to call you a bloggy buddy and keep doing the great work that you do!! xoxo

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  27. That sounds like my hair wash rotation!

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  28. You're beautiful, and GO YOU for losing weight. I know how hard that is, and 40 pounds is an awesome accomplishment!!!

    There will always be people to try to put you down, or not agree with you, or not like the way you look. One quote that sticks in my mind: You can be the biggest, ripest peach in the bunch and someone will still hate peaches.

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  29. I have to fill in my brows because otherwise they're too light and I feel like they blend into my face. I like them to be dark like my hair. But it I had nice dark brows I probably wouldn't bother.

    And as for selfies, I say go for it! Maybe people think it's conceited but hey, I take it as meaning you're feeling beautiful. Too many women knock themselves and look down on themselves. If you feel good and want to take pics of yourself then do it. Love yourself.

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  30. Good for you for being so open and for sticking to your guns! This was a great post, I'm glad you hit publish!

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  31. Elle! I loved this!
    You are beautiful and I'm so happy that you realize that now. Those are other people are ugly. I definitely know how hard it is to drown them out, but once you reach a certain point in your life, the need to care slowly starts to fade away by itself. :)

    Btw -- It's amazing how much weight you've lost. That's such an accomplishment and so inspiring. I'm working on losing about that much now! Wish me luck. Hehe.

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  32. This is an amazing post, and so inspirational! You are beautiful Hun and I can't see why anyone would think other wise! Your blog is wonderful, but there's always going to be people out there that dislike and don't appreciate your hard work! And also I will never apologize for my makeup collection either LOL! I might have to steal this tag if that's okay!

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  33. You're 37? You look so much younger, I bet you get that a lot..! Thanks for doing the tag..! I thought it would be so much fun to read what other people are done apologizing for..! People can be so cruel, I think you're beautiful, and what attracted me to your IG was your selfie!! :)

    xoVeronica

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  34. Good for you!
    I need to try #3!

    xoxox,
    CC

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  35. Such an inspirational post for all of us shy and introverted girls! I seriously thought you were in your early 20's! You are beautiful, you keep taking those selfies!

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  36. It stinks that people can say such hurtful things that stick with us for years. I've been there, for sure. You're smart not to listen to that crazy talk anymore! You're beautiful and your blog is awesome too! :)

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  37. I wish people would realize the power that words have. We say so many things in jest but never know if the comment is actually hurting someone because we don't take the time to think about our actions.

    I think that selfies are empowering and great!

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  38. I'm so glad you went for it anyways and hit publish on this post! Those awful, hurtful people can't win now, you're stronger because of awful people! I'm so sorry you had to go through the pain, but I'm so happy that you continued your blog and working on YOU! I think you're pretty damn gorgeous, I loooove your selfies, and no one's going to change that! This post was so inspirational, thanks Elle.

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  39. My bloggy friend, I am proud of you. Your comment on my post makes sense now - you get the vulnerable heeby-jeebies. This post was amazing. Brave. Honest. And though you may feel a bit naked, swinging in the breeze, please know that you are not. I appreciate you and your blog. Keep being you and #haterstotheleft.

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  40. You are beautiful and I love all your selfies. I feel like mine don't turn out as nice, so I don't take as many.

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  41. You go girl!! I'm super, introverted, shy, and have been told I'm not pretty (too pale, and bad skin). I think you are gorgeous and my heart hurts that anyone would ever tell you otherwise. I also think you're super brave to put yourself out there. I love following bloggers who are real and who I can relate to. Thank you for sharing your heart. I get nervous and certain posts as well. It's hard to be open and vulnerable on the internet when so many people can criticize, but it's so worth it when it speaks to someone else. This did that for me!

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  42. On a light-hearted note, I second the twice-weekly washing rule. If I wash more than twice a week my hair gets dry and my color fades too fast.

    And on a more serious note...seriously girl, you are not fat or ugly or unattractive! You're pretty, funny, and smart. And you don't look anything close to 37, FYI. So don't believe people who are out to be mean!! They're ignorant and cruel and probably trying to cover for their own insecurities anyway!!

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  43. It is so a victory, my unique features have always gotten (mostly) negative attention and I've realized more and more over the last 5 or so years that I love every single unique feature, and that I love being different... So, keep posting those selfies!


    Xo, Megan, www.TfDiaries.com

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  44. i have always thought you were pretty, and you seem so nice, even though i've never met you, which in my world makes you even prettier. great post!

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  45. I can't believe people have spoken to you and treated you that way! I am so sorry about that. Don't listen to their words. God made you beautiful and he loves you just the way you are. Do what you feel like on your blog, it's yours! If other people don't like it then they can leave. Keep your chin up :)

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  46. In my humble opinion it wouldn't make sense for a beauty blogger to NOT share photos of herself, particularly if you're showing what a particular makeup or color looks like on a real human. I like it when you post photos of yourself because then I can see what a makeup technique (or whatever you're showing) is supposed to look like! I think it makes you a real person; even though I don't know you in real life I feel like you are a friend whose opinions and thoughts I trust. I like seeing you for that reason!

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  47. Great post! I wish I could become better at selfies myself, but alas I have a feeling I'll always hate them lol! Oh and you're gorgeous btw so who cares what others say right?

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  48. Thank you so much for being so honest! It is hard to be so open in the blogging world, and I'm so glad you could be honest. Hearing all the negative things said about you makes my heart break, SERIOUSLY what is wrong with people. I truly and HONESTLY think you are beautiful (and always have)! You have long gorgeous brunette locks, you have some of the prettiest eyes I've ever seen and a beautiful smile! I'm so glad that you can ignore this and be happy with yourself, no matter what others say. That's a victory and YAY for selfies! I think they are empowering!!!!!!

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  49. I'm not even going to tell you you're not ugly...because you've already realized how beautiful you are! I know how you feel (we are mutual followers on IG!) I was tormented and teased growing up about my big nose, overbite, ears that stick out (and all of it true)...but in my late teens & early 20s I began to realize that "Hey, I'm not ugly...people actually DO think I'm attractive just as I am!) I'm now 43, a photographer, beauty blogger, and all around goofball...I know that being loved for who I am is the most wonderful thing of all. Am I gorgeous? No way. But I post selfies...you've seen me! ;) Thank you for posting this...women of all ages need to know that everyone has insecurities, gets teased for SOMETHING and is NOT perfect. Filters, photoshop & all else aside...we're all women wholove makemakeup or fashion or whatever draws us to each other's blogs, IG or YouTube. And nobody is better than anybody else...just different.

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  50. You are awesome! Thank you for speaking up.
    I was actually very surprised by your age. I thought you were a wee lass. :-)

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  51. Love your thoughts on selfies! It's upsetting that people can be so cruel, but it's so inspiring the way you stand up to them by being yourself. You go, girl!

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  52. I admire every one of your thoughts in this post.

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  53. I can't imagine you ugly, for the first visit on your blog I thought you're beautiful and smart. I appreciate your thoughts.
    xo

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  54. I'm BAFFLED by the fact that you didn't see yourself as being absolutely beautiful, or that anyone would ever say such a thing to you! You are STUNNING, and I don't say that lightly (I'm not one for false compliments). It sucks how words and ideas can stick with and shape you, but I think you sharing this is so powerful and is diminishing the negativity and horrible (and untruthful) things that were said about you. You're amazing, love. I'm grateful for your posts and advice - and your honesty!

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  55. Also, I fill in my brows religiously and feel like it's helped MY self esteem - I overplucked back in like, 9th grade, and they've never grown back. So filling in - yes please! :)

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  56. This is the best post I've read in a long time. We as women struggle with our looks, we all do. It's a personal struggle I have as well. We always find ourselves critiquing and wishing we could change this or that. I struggled with starting my blog because I was afraid people wouldn't think I was "pretty" enough or look like your "typical" blogger. There comes a point where you have to see the potential in yourself and go on from the negativity. Your post was so inspiring and you ARE beautiful! I look at you and am in total amazement of how gorgeous you are!

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  57. I could give you a kiss! I am disappointed that selfies have a negative connotation; doggone shame! I love selfies!! You are beautiful and your smile lights up my feed on insta. Love ya! Muah:-)

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  58. not that I have "known" you that long but I've always thought you were pretty and sweet and great at what you do. I'm glad you're seeing that as well. there will always be people who don't get it. trust me that's half the world for me lol. but never give up and keep doing you ♥♥

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  59. not that I have "known" you that long but I've always thought you were pretty and sweet and great at what you do. I'm glad you're seeing that as well. there will always be people who don't get it. trust me that's half the world for me lol. but never give up and keep doing you ♥♥

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  60. Girl, haters gonna hate, you just keep doing your thing. And if I look half as good as you when I'm 37 I will thank my lucky stars :)

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  61. Thats right, you shouldnt care what anyboy else thinks. The followers that stay when you post selfies, thats great, those that leave are a non factor anyway ^_^

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  62. I can't believe someone said you were ugly. You're beautiful Elle! I have the same problem, whenever I post a pic of myself (on instagram or twitter) I lose readers. However, it's because I'm african-american. That's why for the most part I usually focus on the product picture. Another thing that comes up is when I post African-american fashion editorials. It's sad, but even if it's Joan Smalls it will not get as many comments as a white editorial. Things are getting better. I posted a hair care line owned by two african-american women and it did well. I think we all experience some backlash from the public and readers. Stay strong and keep moving forward.
    http://www.averysweetblog.com/

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  63. whaaaaaat how could people be this awful to you!? so sorry you've had to deal with the haters. i had a lot of self esteem issues growing up as well so i understand. i hope that you can ignore the haters and know that you are a beautiful person!
    -- jackie @ jade and oak

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  64. Thanks so much for your honesty Elle, this is a fantastic post, you should never be apologetic for these, it what makes you, you and thats a very precious person

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  65. Haha I love this post! And about the brows... every youtuber I watch is always filling them in and I just can't decide if I need to do it or not! I really want to go to sephora and have them do it to me so I can see if it really makes a difference or not!
    www.amemoryofus.blogspot.com

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  66. You SHOULD be proud. Honestly your selfies are beautiful! I know how mean comments about looks stay with you. When I was younger I had a few occasions where people just straight up said I was ugly, to my face. And it still sticks with me no matter how far I know I've come. It's hard not to hate those people for how they've made you feel too, but I have gotten to a place where I recognize that things must be pretty bad off in their lives to make them think they should talk to other people like that, and then I feel a little sorry for them (even though I'm still pretty pissed haha).

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  67. There was no need to be nervous about posting this. People who say mean things, judge harshly and look down on others do so because of their own issues, not because those things are actually true. People who criticize are trying to make themselves feel better and have no business making others feel bad in the process. You are beautiful and don't ever apologize for who you are!!!

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  68. You are beautiful! There is always going to be some a**hole that feels the need to inform us what they think is wrong. It happens to most everyone. Keep blogging and posting your gorgeous selfies!!! xoxo

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  69. Elle! You have an amazing blog and are beautiful, I love when you post on instagram because you're always so positive and kind. You are very very smart for not listening to the people who hate!

    I am with you on the hair thing, literally once a week for this girl too! My hair is too dry for that.

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  70. Just found your blog and love it. I applaud you for taking selfies and can't imagine that you lose followers due to it!!! That's insane. Join my world of daily blog fashion pics - I take selfies every day! :) Not ashamed. If someone doesn't like it they can move on to the next blog. Rock on for owning your beauty and womanly power to do whatever the hell you want :) Cheers to you.

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  71. I love all of your posts, Elle, but I always love the most personal ones a little bit extra. I know they're always the hardest to write and I have a few posts that I've been developing for more than a year. I admire your honestly and openness so much-- this is some motivation to dust off those old files and try to finish at least one of them.

    Also, I just read your post on body issues from 2011 and I have never noticed a thing about your nose other than it's... there? It's a nose? Honestly, people are terrible.

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  72. WHAT! I cannot believe people can be so cruel. You are gorgeous. Keep those selfies comin'!

    And don't worry...you're not alone on the washing hair once a week thing. I wash mine about every 5 days. I find that my hair is stronger, fuller, shinier, and my hair color lasts longer. Wins all around! Before I was washing my hair every time I was in the shower and it completely dried out my hair and scalp, causing hairs to break. I had split ends like no ones business and thing scraggly lookin hair at the ends. GROSS.

    Now I wash it every 4-5 days and use MoroccanOil on the days I wash it (while it's wet) and a little bit on the ends after every styling (even on days I haven't washed it). It's worked WONDERS!

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  73. I cannot believe you're 37, first of all. Never would have guessed that.

    Also, I love this post. I'm glad you hit publish. You are beautiful; don't ever forget it!

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  74. Hello, I am a long time follower of you your blog but this is my first time posting. I just wanted to say that you are really awesome. Your blog is great and you are really beautiful. And your tutorials beautiful and real. So many tutorials on the internet are so photo-shopped or leave out key details and it's so frustrating. I don't mean to trash other bloggers and not all bloggers do it, but quite a few seem to be either constant advertisements or trying to promote a "lifestyle" that only a millionaire fembot can keep up with. Any time I make the mistake of visiting those blogs I leave kind of bored and depressed. When I visit your blog I see a beautiful girl living a beautiful life who is genuine and not afraid to think for herself, and I never regret visiting your blog. So please don't be down on you, you are really really awesome!
    I was feeling a bit blue today myself and I saw this video and it helped me a bit, maybe it can help cheer you up too?
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bT466f5epNY

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  75. You go, girl! :) I adore your beautiful selfies! Keep doing what you do. It's truly informative and inspiring! T. http://tickledpinkwoman.blogsot.com

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  76. Elle, I am so sorry for every cruel remark thrown your way. No one has a right to say things like that to you. I will never understand why people are so cruel. More often than not it seems as if it is coming out of their own insecurities. But really, it's wrong. And I'm sorry for those terrible things. You are beautiful and I can hardly believe you're 37 because you look so young! Not that it's bad to be 37, I'm just saying you look amazing at your age or any age. Good for you for finding confidence in yourself and seeing your beauty! You have such a sweet spirit and I love how kind and gentle you are. Good for you for posting those selfies!

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  77. wow... deep post. very nice and continue to do what u're doing!
    xo
    MOSAMUSE

    www.MOSAMUSE.com

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  78. Awww Elle, I think you are beautiful inside and out! I totally feel you though with the last part, I can be a very quite person and sometimes I can be too nice and can be taken advantage of. But I've learned to be a stronger person and to ignore the people that can be toxic in my life. But yeah I totally admire you for taking selfies, I'm still not comfortable myself, even with my own blog when I pose for my outfits, I'm still uncomfortable because I've never liked taking solo's of myself. But I have to agree that taking those pictures themselves are such a victory. But yeah I just want to say keep doing what your doing because your doing such a great job! :)

    Nina
    http://curvymod.blogspot.com/

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  79. Look at all of the support you've gotten up there!!! :D
    I think you're beautiful! :) And you're a beauty blogger... you SHOULD be posting pictures of yourself. Not like you're a food blog and posting only pics of yourself. Some people are just... jerks. That's all there is to it. :/

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  80. love. this. post.
    keep those selfies coming.

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  81. I love this post! I used to feel the same way about taking advice from an ugly girl although you are far from it Gorgeous!

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  82. You are so beautiful and I can't believe anyone would ever say otherwise or tell you that you needed to change. I'm so sorry you've had to deal with so much negativity both in life and on the internet, but I'm glad to hear you have worked hard to rise above it all, and rightly so. Don't ever let someone else's negativity bring you down.
    Chic on the Cheap

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  83. I LOVE you! I love that you have enough self esteem to still blog despite any detractors. Hey, we all have them. I think you are absolutely gorgeous, and enjoy your photos/interacting with you on IG and Twitter. I am now subbing on blogloving. And your little morkie is a little gem. Rock on girl! You have a fan here in Augusta. Next time I'm in ATL, drinks!!! :)

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  84. I think you're beautiful and I love you! I have more respect for you now that I know how far you came and how you rise from all the negativity! Much love, Elle!

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  85. Woah! I don't know how anyone could have the heart to tell another human being they're ugly. Ugliness is something on the inside, not the outside. For the record I think you're beautiful and I love reading your blog. I like to check on it and read your rants and raves and all other things :) I think it's wonderful that you're a lovely person and just take selfies. Who cares!? Stay strong. You've got a fabulous blog and don't ever think otherwise. I think it's a shame you've had to go through this but well done for being strong! I have more respect for you as I've now learned what you've been through. Looking forward to a wonderful 2014! Best of luck!
    Maddy xxx

    www.crystaltipsrandomblog.blogspot.com

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  86. funny...i just posted about selfies. way to go for finally seeing who you really are...a beautiful woman inside and out.

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  87. Send you kisses babe!

    Carolina

    www.the-world-c.blogspot.com

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  88. DANG girl. I don't comment much (if ever) but that's crazy. You're very pretty, I would have never guessed you were over 30. People are jealous, no doubt.

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  89. elle, what a fantastic post. i just "met" you {thanks for stopping by my blog} but can already tell from your words AND your photos that you are beautiful inside and out.

    Molly {Dreams in HD}
    http://www.dreamsinhd.blogspot.com

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  90. I think you're fabulous girl, Elle. Your hair, your face, it is definitely not of an ugly person. I went through some of your past post with photographs and none of them I would be ashamed of.
    I felt much like you in my teenage years but funnily we always associate lack of bunch of friends with our looks. As it was always our fault. But it isn't.
    I'd love to look like you at 37 (quickly approaching) and have that playful, funny spirit that you have. You are beautiful girl, don't forget that. xxx

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  91. Elle, I finally had a moment to sit down and give this post the attention it deserves. I don't know where to start except to say shame on the haters and kudos to you. You are beautiful, well written and most importantly a true person. For that, all should be envious.

    Huge hugs. And I'm sharing.

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  92. I've already commented but this post has been on my mind since I read it. I want to say that I salute you for your openness. The rawness of this post is extremely beautiful, and so are you.
    xo

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  93. I too wash my hair infrequently. I have NEVER been an everyday hair washer, but in recent years with a baby I now only wash it once a week or so. It just takes too much TIME. Plus my hair is dyed "pink ombré" so... I don't want to fade that out quickly.

    Regarding your "selfie" statements.... My jaw dropped when I read what people have said to you. You are beautiful! And, honestly? More power to you posting pictures of yourself! You are very pretty & I, for one, love seeing your face! <3

    (Dozywozy from IG)

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  94. oh i love this post!!! ans totally agree with all of the above, what a absolutely wonderful perspective. i am so sorry you ever ever felt ugly, you are not, you are beautiful inside and out!

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  95. I put my hands into fire for saying: I do not believe that ANYBODY unfollows you because of your selfies! NEVER!!! That must be a bad coincidence for sure!!! You know there is so many people who only follow you so you follow back and then they unfollow you again. I bet it is these. And yes: YOU ARE PRETTY! Let nobody else ever tell you anything else. Love you Elle!!! You are so honest and real! I am blogging since July 2013 and for about half the time I did not post any pictures of me too. But then I realized I have to and now I do not care anymore at all. I just do. :-) I never paint my eyebrows either- except sometimes for a photo. Kisses sweetheart! XOXO, Sissi http://www.beauty4free2u.com

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  96. Aw Elle. You are gorgeous! Don't you ever let anyone else tell you otherwise. :)

    But really, I know the feeling...for a long time I felt like I was the ugliest person in the world and nothing I could do would make me even the slightest bit pretty. I wouldn't even call myself "pretty" now, to be honest, but I'm sure as heck not ugly. Acceptably plain, maybe? Verging on occasionally good-looking?

    And honestly, I'm jealous of your eyebrows...they're so perfect, and here I have these super-bushy man brows...! *lol*

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  97. Awesome post! Thanks for opening up :) I remember when you didn't post pics of yourself. Look how far you've come! I like self-empowered selfies... not funeral selfies lol (yes apparently that's a thing...). I hope you continue to take selfies and share videos/pics of yourself on your blog.

    And I wash my hair once a week as well. You have gorgeous hair so keep it up! There's dry shampoo... not washing your hair every day is not gross.

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  98. What a great post, Elle. Way to go for having the courage to share it and not let the haters define who you are. In many ways, I've felt the same way you have, especially in terms of trying to get people to like me who I've now learned I'm better off without. I also know what it's like being quieter in order to avoid getting teased or hurt. I think you are very beautiful, and I wish I had even a little bit of the awesome knowledge and skill that you do when it comes to makeup and styling. I am shocked that people would criticize and put you down. You are also a fantastic writer and inspiring person, and I'm very proud to have you as one of my blog friends!

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  99. And you forgot to add, Courageous! Elle, only recently did we "meet" via Instagram, but the little that I know about you I know that you are a very sweet person who has a great blog and is friendly.
    Thank you for sharing so much of yourself with your readers. I know how hard it can be to expose ones insecurities, I have my own, but I am not as brave as you are to put them out for the world to read. I am truly in awe by your courage. Keeping on doing what you do and I have no doubt you're gonna do wonderful.

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  100. THIS is why i follow your blog, and follow you on instagram. (If I had any other form of social media, I'd follow you there, too) BECAUSE i knoooow you are a genuine person, who truly cares, AND puts other before yourself. I cannot tell you enough, Elle how much I appreciate your likes and comments on my instagram AND blog. Seriously. You know me, I post lots of selfies, too..but I didn't always. It was because of people like you, whom I don't know in real life, that make me feel good about myself. Thankfully, I haven't had any mean comments before, but I think that's mainly cause I have a small follower base...regardless, I LOVE your selfies. The one you posted where you were on the floor with your cute little sock bun, just made me smile. You looked EXTREMELY happy in it......and THAT'S why i follow people i "don't know in real life" on instagram. Honestly, I get more sweet feedback and inspiring messages, and love conversing with the people i follow on ig that i don't know IRL. It's very rare that my real life friends like any of my selfies or outfit posts..it makes me sad..but then i get a like from you and I'm on the top of the world.

    I posted this thing on my blog talking about another blog who posted a thing about selfies on their blog, and I thought it was hilarious, mainly cause I'm SO GUILTY of like every single one of them. Okay this is getting long. Basically I'll post more selfies, if you do. LOL Have a lovely day, Elle. You're beautiful.

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  101. This post was incredible and I absolutely loved it. Never take any crap from people who have nothing nice to say. You are beautiful!

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  102. I'm so very glad that you wrote this post. You're pretty inside and out. <3 <3 <3

    http://www.somethingmonumental.com/

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  103. oh girl, thank you so much for nudging me to come over & give it the attention it deserves. In this fast paced week I admit I glossed over what I now see as one of the most beautiful posts I've ever read.

    it's so cool to see you grow over the past few years. I'm happy I was able to come in early enough to see your transformation. I've always thought you were beautiful & it's inspiring to see you see that (and believe it!) yourself.

    I've also been on a path of self-acceptance this past year & it's amazing to fall into your "thing" and realize your beauty. glad we're doing it together! keep at it.

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  104. I dont wash my hair like I used to either...its totally changed my hair from sumwhat corse, thick&frizzy to smooth, fine&thin looking (its deciving, I actually have a lot of hair, its thrown many stylists off their schedule:() I hate having to tell people cause they look at you like your gross.I used to wash my hair everyday but as ive gotten older my scalp just couldnt take that much cleaning. I went thru almost 2yrs of super bad dandruff trying every shampoo for it&deep conditioner known to man& I finally found #1 my scalp dosnt like alot of shampoos.#2 I can no longer get my hair washed in a salon as everytime I spend a month in hidin/ scalp recovery(im not talkin a bunch a lil flakes)&#3 the most important I can only wash my hair every 8 days... I have now gone 2yrs without my bad problem reaccuring(it be 4yrs but I let an expesive all natural salon wash my hair, regreted it by the end of the day& into the following 3 weeks)

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  105. I love you Elle! & I think you're gorgeous! Great & inspiring post.

    xx

    Erin @ http://www.truffles-ruffles.com/

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  106. you are beautiful and that is all I'm going to say on that.

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  107. I cannot believe people are so ignorant and rude. Not only are you beautiful but you have the best hair on any blog I've ever read. It's sad that people will cut you down to attempt to make themselves feel better. Keep that chin up and that gorgeous hair flowing. Also post more about your weight loss!!
    -michellerrific

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  108. Oh honey.. I'm glad that you have turned over a new leaf and now have faith in yourself. I spent all of my childhood/youth and up until I was in my early 20's being morbidly obese. While I was always the girl with the "pretty face", everyone seemed to look past it. I was often "tortured" due to my size. At my largest, I was OVER 450lbs, along with being 6'1". It was a lonely and cruel existence that I never want to re-live and I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. While I still see myself as a fat girl that will never be in the "cool club" or accepted for the beautiful soul that I know I am, I strive to attempt to look at myself with eyes that are loving and accepting. I also try to tell myself that people are ignorant and cruel-- forgiving them for what they don't know. You ARE beautiful and I say that with no hesitance! Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise or make you think otherwise-- they aren't worthy of you! XOXO

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  109. SOme things should never change!
    v-is-for-violet.blogspot.com

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  110. Great post! I want to do this tag too! because I also have things I don't want to apologize for.
    Elle, I just got to your blog through Liesl Loves pretty things, and I think you're beautiful and you should do whatever pleases you and don't listen to negative comments, because that's just envy. Yes, envy because they don't dare overcome their own limits and want to make others feel bad. Go Elle go!!

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  111. Okay, honestly I read this whole post and all I could think of was "Who is the ugly girl she is talking about?" Love your blog, your pictures, your videos. Never listen to those people. Never ever. Inaccurate and those are the ugly people.

    <3
    Emma
    www.behindtheleopardglasses.com

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  112. It is weird what beauty things people feel the need comment on.

    Also, good on you for posting selfies. I think it does get a bad rep, but that also kind of confuses me, becuase people also like seeing the person who's intagram/blog/whatever they are following to know, as you put it, that they are real.

    Lastly... I'll admit I found this post via Ashley from Happy.Sweet. Pretty and her links. I'd never been to your blog before and therefore had never seen a photo of you before. I went to your instagram and am absolutely FLOORED anyone tells you that you are not pretty. You are GORGEOUS. Nose job? Fat? A) not anyone else's business, I can't believe people would say such things but B) also not true! Anyway, looking forward to reading more from you.

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  113. I think you're beautiful. Crazy haters. Awesome post. Seriously awesome.

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  114. I love number 1----My eye makeup alone covers the entire surface of a card table!! Haha!! woopsie. Anyway, I was just looking at your pic on twitter (because I entered your amazing $1000 gift card giveaway!) and I was thinking how pretty you are! So I'm not really sure why people tell you you're not attractive--probably because they are insecure and unattractive themselves! Really, I think you are a beautiful person! :)

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  115. Say whaaaaat?! You're really pretty, keep taking them selfies girl!
    Lucy ox

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