"Blogger Breakdown" sounds so dramatic, right? And I feel silly and nervous about sharing this.
After all, no one is making me blog, so why am I stressed? And there are bigger problems in the world than this. Plus, there are plenty who have kids, work, go to school, etc, with more responsibilities than I.
But I'm freaking out. Where's the chapter on what to do when you're having a Blogger Breakdown?
I feel like I'm swimming, swimming to keep my head above water, and yet I'm still sinking.
I feel like I'm alone, but I know I can't be the only one who feels like this.
The truth is, I'm overwhelmed. And I don't have any answers on how to fix this.
I'm trying to be everything for everyone. And I'm not getting nearly enough back.
I wake up at 5am, blog, work, and blog until midnight.
And all for a 30 second view of my blog and a possible comment.
But I love blogging. I just don't know how to handle it all.
How do you handle when a commenter doesn't believe your results on a product? When you spend over a month researching, recording results, thoroughly reviewing, only to feel your integrity attacked?
How do you handle the daily "follow my blog" comments or the commenters who don't read the post at all, skip to the comments, and copy one as their own thoughts? Or just flat out copy your posts?
How do you handle when any mention of your blog on Instagram always gets the fewest likes?
How do you handle it when you're unfollowed or not responded to, for no reason?
How do you handle when a blogger lists her favorite beauty bloggers and you're not on it?
Normally, I shrug it off, thankful for what I do have. It's part of the job. I have to do more. I need to be better.
But I'm human and sometimes it gets to me. I'm busting my ass, sacrificing personal relationships for this blog I love so much. Because I believe in this blog, and most importantly, myself.
I have anxiety, guilt, stress, that I'm not doing nearly enough.
And so I realized I was having a Blogger Breakdown.
I realized it when I noticed I had forgotten to pay a bill.
I realized it when I never can relax, because I always have so much to do, and there's another blogger out there, who's working twice as hard. I need to work harder. I need to be better.
I realized it when I spend more time on my phone or computer than with loved ones, and especially when in the company of loved ones. Their patience with me is growing thin.
Because if I don't answer that comment, that tweet, email, or visit that blog, everyone will forget about my blog, seeking answers somewhere else. I want to be that must-see blog you visit daily, not because you're being courteous, but because you want to visit.
And I feel like I'm not allowed to talk about it. Just don't blog if it's such a hassle, right? But this is something I love, want to do, and need to do.
It's not burnout--the ideas, the passions are all still there. And I still plan on blogging.
I just hope you'll be there for the ride.
Thank you.
I think there are very few blogs that become super popular very quickly - it's a bit of luck, really. Honestly, I always thought you should be proud of achieving what you've achieved - there are always comments and you have plenty of followers. I agree, though, that a lot of people visit other blogs and leave a comment simply because they hope to receive a comment back... And unfortunately, those comments that consist of very little meaning, but instead (or often) a dozen of links to FB/Twitter/Blog etc. etc. etc It does feel soul destroying most of the time. It gets me, too, from time to time. And sometimes when it really gets me, I put all those people in a Spam folder. I never follow back either - I think if there is a blog I like, I'll follow it anyway, but mostly the ones who want a follow aren't... As for research that takes time and effort... I know about it, too. Whenever I dedicate a week to a fashion designer, hardly anyone comments on those posts because they need to be read. So people just ignore them. And yet it takes me weeks if not months to prep for each and every one of them. I don't know. Sometimes I get upset, and at times I just learn to grow a thicker skin and appreciate those who actually come to my blog over and over again. Back to your blog, I don't think it will be forgotten if you stop visiting others - I'd still come and read, for example. But I also feel that you reached the point when you need to think about yourself and give yourself a little time off... Perhaps, schedule some of the posts or simply take a couple of days off. It does help. I mean, 5 hours of sleep and busy days are never a good idea... No wonder you feel so stressed.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, sorry for the randomness... I could probably write an essay on the subject, but I better not... ;) Big hug! x
Hummmmm not too sure how to answer this one, as each bloggers blog and what they want from it is so personal to them. But reading what you have said, it sounds like you need a blogger break, but....you won't because you're so worried that readers will forget your blog in your absence. Right? I think you have to sit down and really think about why you blog and what you want to get from it. You say you love it, but it sounds like it is just bringing you down right now and making you and those around you unhappy. In blogging there seems to be some kind of clique, one that I really don't buy into. My blog is tiny but I dip in and out of it as and when I please, I won't put pressure on myself because I am far more than my blog. As lovely as your blog is and I enjoy reading your posts maybe you need a little bit more 'me time' and less 'blog time' x
ReplyDeleteYou definitely had a blogger breakdown, and that's ok. I think we have all done it at some point. If it's still something you love and enjoy keep doing. When it becomes a chore or a hassle it's time for a break. I took a 3 month break one time and it felt so good to just disconnect from always having to take photos or come up with post ideas. After that break, I felt totally re-energized! Good luck and I hope you find the balance you need. I love your blog if that matters :) Heather
ReplyDeleteI think your blog is a popular one, I visit it often.. I think it is ok to feel a little down at times, but know you are doing the best you can do. I find myself blogging or keeping in contact with the blogging world while having family time, when I realize it I put it away and get back to it later.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand and it can be disheartening and frustrating at times, however you have no control over what others say, do or think - the only thing you can control is what you do with your time. It might work to set yourself a limit to how many hrs you do what to get a better balance between creating new content, responding to comments, visiting other blogs and of course time to do all the other life stuff we need to do. Ultimately noone has time to do everything and your time is best spent producing high quality posts :o) Xx
ReplyDeleteMakeup by Candlelight
Darling I used to feel the same way! Now I just try to spread the love and ignore the haters. Keep up the fabulous work!
ReplyDeletexoxox,
CC
I think the biggest thing I'm noticing here is measuring your success against others. There's no great formula to why some blogs explode. I feel like it's all just luck. Once in a while I find myself comparing and it makes me feel the worst. I know I have a good little blog and whatever is suppose to happen will happen. I highly recommend this post: http://thebloggess.com/2013/08/15-things-you-absolutely-must-know-about-social-media-or-your-face-will-melt-off-and-get-eaten-by-goats/ It put a lot into perspective for me.
ReplyDeletewe follow your blog because we like your advice and think you're great. if you blog once a day or once a month, we'll read the posts. if it's causing you so much stress, you should reevaluate, though, because if it stops being fun for you, or is causing more harm than good, than it's not worth it. you have your loyal followers, though, and we love your blog.
ReplyDeleteHi Elle, I feel exactly like this at least once a month, blogging takes up a lot of time and effort and I know your posts certainly do becasue they are well research and photographed. The way i handle it now is to blog less times a week, in that way you can at least have some of your free time and sanity back. I only reply to comments when I have time, but I always reply even to follow-for-follow bloggers, just out of courtesy. Take a weeks or months break hun, then come back to it when youre feeling recharged. Hugs
ReplyDeleteOh darlin' ! It sounds to me like you need a break, and that's not a bad thing! I'm sorry you feel stressed and hurt over your blog.
ReplyDeleteI want you to know I love your blog! It's fun and informative.
I'm "here" if you want to vent.
Hugs!
You are so dedicated to your blog. I can't believe people question whether you trily mean your reviews. That must be so hurtful, especially after all the effort you put in. You are one of the hardest working bloggers and people who are that rude do not deserve a second's worth of thought in your busy life. I have a hard time with balancing everything. Just know you aren't alone in feeling overwhelmed. You are an amazing blogger and deserve all the success you are getting!
ReplyDeleteYou're definitely not alone in this, like you said. I think that every blogger experiences this from time to time. I know I have, and I'm not nearly as well known as you are in the community. People don't realize just how much work it takes. I don't get why someone would question how a product works for you. It could work perfectly for you and suck for someone else... everyone is different... duh? Pfft. Dumb.
ReplyDeleteI get it. Really, I do. I've felt the same way.
ReplyDeleteI believe we share similar traits -- the willingness to make extraordinary effort for others, a deep need for appreciation. Yet others let us down. They don't reciprocate enough.
I've fallen into the hole you describe. The only way out I've found is to realize that we can't make others love us. They will do whatever they want to do, regardless of how hard we try. So we have to choose to do what WE want. What makes us happy.
For me, that's being nice and helping others. But I do it independent of the reaction of those I help. I don't depend on them; instead, I value the intrinsic good of my acts. Many times, that's the only contentment I'm going to get. But it's enough, because I know I'm being true to myself.
Good luck, Elle. You have my deepest sympathy for your struggle
I totally feel you on this. Blogging is SO much harder than I thought it would be! I don't think you ever really realize how much work it is until you start doing it and then realize what little free time you have has to go to keeping up with your blog and then it becomes really frustrating. I don't know if it will help but have a glass on wine while you're blogging, that always seems to relax me and then I let loose while writing. Anyone who doesn't understand your passion for your blog doesn't understand you since blogging allows you to really express yourself! Enjoy what you do and know that even if you take a break we'll all still be here to read a new post when you're ready to post one! :)
ReplyDelete<3,
Pamela
http://sequinsandseabreezes.blogspot.com
i think every blogger feels this at one point or another. and to be honest, if you always try and make EVERYONE happy, that's the ONLY way to make EVERYONE UNHAPPY. you can't please everyone all of the time; you can only put out what makes YOU happy. if you enjoy a product and research the hell out of it/post about it, and if one person agrees with you/finds it and tests it out and it works for them as well, then you have done your job.
ReplyDeletewhile you take blogging seriously and love everyone in the community, putting yourself out there on the internet *will* attract trolls who hate what you say, leave mean shit in the comments and/or spread their toxic shit all over the place. that's the nature of the internet so why even bother with people like this? they're SO NOT WORTH your time, energy, emotion or effort. you have so many people who enjoy what you put out there so focus on that. there is not a blog out there that EVERYONE LOVES and follows and adores because everyone is different, everyone has different likes/dislikes and opinions.
-kathy
Vodka and Soda
This I understand, as I've felt this way a lot, but I always tell myself that it doesn't matter what people think or say - we can't please everyone so we shouldn't try. What we should do is blog because we love it and because it's fun. The moment it stops being fun, we need to take a step back and think about how to realign our goals so that blogging is fun again. Set aside a specific time to blog - I blog when everyone's asleep, and I find it peaceful and a way to relax. Try not to let it get between you and your loved ones. They need your time and attention too. You can always get back to your blogging life after.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard for a lot of us, but we're still here kicking. We're here for you too, lovely. Don't forget that there are trolls out there - and they don't matter. Not to us, not to you. Take care, and I hope you'll feel better soon! :)
I think this is something most bloggers have experienced as well so you're not alone! I feel like blogging is my second job and it can get overwhelming at times for me as well. There is a lot of pressure to stay on top of everything. When I start feeling that way, it's time to step away from the computer/social media and do something fun for myself. I don't read blogs on the weekends so I have time to relax and have a break from it every week.
ReplyDelete-Sharon
The Tiny Heart
Target Giveaway!
Oh girl! I soooo hear you and I have sooo been there. More times than I'd like to admit. Make sure you take a break and try to remember you are doing it because you love it. And only do it when you are happy doing it. We'll all still be here :)
ReplyDeletethis is such a tough topic to approach... I've been there. Stepping away for a time has always worked for me. Give myself room to breathe. You just have to find what de-stresses you and keeps you sane! Good luck, girl. You're doing an amazing job from my perspective.
ReplyDeleteI have been her to girl! There is so much to do for blogging and I think people don't realize it. Even on vacation I am blogging, or prepping posts, or responding to comments when i should be relaxing for fear of getting to far behind. Know that everyone is not going to like what you write and that is ok, the ones who do like it are the ones who matter.
ReplyDeleteHonestly I feel like beauty blogging must be tough! With all the time spent writing reviews, money for products, and keeping track of everything, I don't know how you do it! I feel like every time I read your blog there is valuable content. You are the only beauty blog I read. I know what it is like to have emails not answered, not be taken seriously, but just remember how many people LOVE your blog! :)
ReplyDeleteHoney your only human!! It's okay to feel stressed out and pressured. That's part of life! Just remember that you can't please everyone, and if someone doesn't like your blog or your reviews, doesn't think your bring truthful, then that's their problem!! As long as YOU know your being honest, enjoy what your doing, then know that is enough. Take all of the Positve comments and suppose that you get and embrace it and just ignore the rest. There is always going to be someone who doesn't approve or leaves rude and nasty comments, but again that is their problem. You shouldn't have to please everyone in life. As long as your happy, and you blog because YOU love it, then that's all that matters! I know you post daily, and I love that as a follower, but even if you didn't I would still read, love, and support you! You could post once a week or once a month and I would still faithfully read your posts! I think that it's great that you try to reply to everyone and every comment, because that makes following some one enjoyable, but take your time! You don't need to reply the second someone comments! And as for people who just comment to ask for follows etc, ignore them! If they don't honestly care about your post and your blog then they aren't worth your time!
ReplyDeleteSorry I bascially wrote a book in this comment, but I really do love your blog and appreciate the hard work you put into to. Your simply wonderful my dear!
I'm feeling the exact same way right now. It's so hard keeping up a youtube channel, a blog, social media, and working full time. I'm finally realizing that I really shouldn't compare myself to other bloggers especially those big time blogs with multiple writers who blog full time. I just need to take some time to slow down and enjoy the roses and you should too! We'll still be here when you come back :)
ReplyDeleteYour blog is amazing. I think you for sure need a blogger break. And you will have all your loyal followers behind you when you are ready. Blogging is hard, and people dont understand how much time, money and effort all get put into it. To have someone question your review is just rude on their behalf. You are taking the time to make things easier for people. You are stating your true opinions and honest review. YOU are what makes your blog great. If you are afraid of taking a break because it might hurt your numbers, you can always do some guest posts in the meantime. You have a wonderful community of bloggers around you and they are always there to help.
ReplyDeleteGirl you are great and no one can take that from you.
xoxo- Jamie @ Makeuplifelove
I know exactly how you feel hun. I have had my fair share of blogger breakdowns too. Sometimes I think should I even continue to put so much effort into blogging but I always try not to think about the negative aspects of blogging. I also get really annoyed when people unfollow me on instagram or don't receive a lot of likes. But you should also keep in mind that a lot of people on social media do buy their likes and followers. I am so happy you brought up this subject and made it more public. You kind of said what everyone is thinking. Keep your head up girl and know that there are a lot of beauty bloggers that love your blog and support you.
ReplyDeletexoxo
Beautetude
Elle, I must commend you on such a brave and honest post. I completely agree, blogging can take over your life for the worst sometimes. I feel the same, am I doing enough etc the sames goes for youtube. The way I see it is you blog when you want to and you get round to answering emails and comments in your own time, you are only human and deserve some restbite. Whatever you blog about is your honest opinion and if someone doesn't agree with it, well tough its YOUR opinion. I can't stand the people that leave comments saying "follow me back" its lazy and rather pathetic. If someone doesnt take a genuine interest in your blog why should you theirs?
ReplyDeleteYou have my support, I like you and your blog :) xoxox
It's so timely that you posted this, because I've been having some of the same feelings lately. When I don't blog every day or don't do enough swatching or social media, I start to feel like a failure or like I'll lose points with people for not being active enough. I'm learning to take a deep breath and not cut out the rest of my life to focus on blogging--even though I love it, there needs to be a balance. I hope you'll be feeling better soon. And please try to get more sleep!!! Your body needs it!! Big hugs <3
ReplyDeleteYes I have felt this way to a degree and I agree with Natalia becoming a big blogger quickly is all about luck. And the biggest thing is you have to ask your self why you are blogging and why you started a blog. If it is a hobby then it should be enjoyable and should not stress you out, hobbies are there to relieve stress not create it. So if it is a hobby then there is nothing wrong in taking some time off. Now if your blog is to you a potential business then starting and running a business is at times stressful it comes with the territory and you have to expect it. So I think this the question you have to ask yourself.
ReplyDeleteFor me I started my blog as a way of gaining new skills and transitioning out of working in graphics and as a graphic designer so I view my blog as a job and I put alot of time into it. I am aware that it takes time and b/c I view it as job/business I do not get emotionally involved. For example the follow for follow comments do not bother me at all, I follow the blogger, leave a nice, thoughtful and quick comment on their blog and then I have a new follow and it is all kept positive. Again we are writing about beauty and fashion not exactly profound. I work in publishing in the marketing department of a magazine and could not imagine telling the web marketing manager I am offended by the possibility of having more follows b/c I did not think it was genuine...she would bitch slap right out of her office. In the real world or the world of business it is all aobut the numbers. But if your blog is a hobby and is more about the inner you then the best thing you can do is not sweat it, either ignore those comments or do what I do and see as positive. And take some time off blogging and having a full time is rough. Again remember why you are doing it.
And most importantly unlike what Shybiker says you should not be doing it get people to "love" you or like you. I think you do a good job with your blog and there is always a learning curve with anything. So take a break and come back refreshed.
Allie of ALLIE NYC
allienyc.com
I totally understand. I'm a very new blogger, but it's discouraging sometimes how much work it takes to get people to care about my thoughts. I don't even care about making money, I just want my thoughts and ideas to my validated. It's hard to realize I'm screaming with thousands of other voices to get some attention.
ReplyDeleteNow might be the time to re-prioritize what you want from your blog. Do you want followers? Do you want more sponsors? Do you really have time for more? I started participating in a blogger sharefest and got a few more followers from that, which made me very happy even though it was small progress. Perhaps scale back your marketing efforts to one or two more things.
If nothing else, know you were my inspiration for starting a blog. I saw how you impacted people, and I wanted to do the same thing. You were also one of the first people who commented on my blog, which made me giddy (I'm a nerd) because my blog mentor cares!!! I'll keep coming back.
Have you thought about taking a break? This time last year, I took my blog offline for a month. It was partly to rebrand, but mostly just to relax! Another blog I follow isn't offline this month, but she announced she's not blogging for the month of February. Yes, I lost a few followers during my month offline, but I gained the numbers back within a month of blogging regularly after coming back.
ReplyDeleteI love your blog. I think your blog is awesome. I'm incredibly impressed at how much time you put into it. But your loyal readers will totally understand if you dial it back a bit.
Elle, you've gotten some really great comments above. Don't really have much to add.
ReplyDeleteMy blogging goals are so different than many, in the sense that right now, I have no plans of monetizing it, and it really is just a hobby for me. A way to get my silliness out there, you know, so I feel no pressure at all if anyone reads me or not. But of course, am always grateful to have connected to others like yourself, who are just really great people. I agree with what some have wrote in terms of maybe just evaluating, and girl, there will always be bloggers out there who are better and worse than us, in terms of readership and audience.
((((hugs))))
I think it's great that you shared this and were honest about it. I definitely had a bit of a blogger breakdown back when I was a wedding blogger trying to write for my own site and several others. I loved it, and sometimes miss blogging on that level and with that much frequency, but it just got to be very overwhelming with work, school, personal relationships, etc. Today, I'm sad to say that I've lost some of my passion for my personal blog, which doesn't have as strong a brand, and am really unsure of where to go with it. Perhaps I'll write my own honest post about those feelings soon. By far, the best part of blogging has been getting to know and connect with fellow bloggers like you. No matter what, I think you should be very proud of what you've accomplished with this awesome blog.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful quote to start the week with :)
ReplyDeleteStai in touch with me on BLOGLOVIN
Love,
FASHIONHYPNOTISED
Oh gosh, Blogging is HARD, isn't it? I say forget all the negative stuff and just focus on what you like about blogging. None of us will always get the results we want, or get the accolades we think we deserve, but in the end we just have to keep pushing on and keep doing what makes us happy;)
ReplyDeleteI feel you. These last couple of day I have been super busy and haven't got around to reading blog and I feel bad about it. Sometime we just need to take a break from blogging. I took a few weeks off of blogging and it feel great.
ReplyDeleteYou blog is amazing and if they true followers they will still be her.
Also I hate to when people don't read what I write.
Oh my goodness - you seem so overwhelmed and stressed. Blogging should be something you enjoy, not an obligation. I don't know much about the blogging business - I blog but, as you know from visiting my blog (thank you, by the way), that I don't blog as a business - I just blog for me, things I like and such. I LOVE getting comments but sadly, rarely do. But that is okay, really.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you need a blogging break and that is okay to do. I love reading your blog (only wish I found it sooner) but of course would understand you taking a break.
I hate you are so stressed. I did come here today, mainly, to make sure I had your blog address right because just nominated you in the Best of Atlanta (for Modern Luxury-Jezebel).
Life is so short, you should enjoy it and if blogging doesn't bringing you joy anymore, then don't be hard on yourself and take some time for yourself - you deserve happiness.
It is totally normal to feel burnt out, even with things you love doing and have passion for. I didn't get a post out today because I just could not bring myself to blog. I've been feeling similarly with not having enough time to do it all and getting frustrated that I'm not growing how I would like to. Stick in there! It will get better. The best blogs grow at a steady rate. :)
ReplyDeleteI think this happens to ALL OF US Elle. Just take it easy, do what you need to do.
ReplyDeleteYou're doing an amazing job. Don't ever get discouraged simply because one person leaves a negative comment. You've got SO MANY followers that love you and love your opinion on products (I know I do!!) I've noticed that a lot of bloggers get burnt out after a while...so I guess it's pretty normal. But don't be so hard on yourself. Keep blogging, but don't let it take over your life. Let it be a PART of your life.
ReplyDeletexo Denise
lovelybohemian.blogspot.com
Ummmm as a newer blogger I totally get what you are saying! I thought I could just spew my randomness out into the blog world and that was all there was to it. However you then start really loving so many other bloggers and what they have to say and you want to comment but shoot it is time consuming! Just know everyone is in the same boat and some days are going to be better than others ;-) xoxoxoxoxo girl!
ReplyDeleteHonestly I counter all of this by blogging on my terms and not apologizing for it. I think I have 30 followers. Most of them seem to be defunct blogs, so maybe 5 followers lol. I don't envy when I see people being snarky towards you like you owe them something. And you don't owe anyone anything really. If you don't post for a day, that shouldn't be a big deal. I've been sick for over a week now and not doing much of anything worthy of blogging, so I haven't. If I can't even work my full 40 hours at my job, forget everything else. Anyway I am always reading and maybe I can't comment on -everything- but I appreciate everything you do and you are on my daily reads list (even if sometimes I pretend a week is only two days and cram all my reading in mid-week)
ReplyDeleteI can understand that you would be stressed and feel guilty because you've been blogging for so long. But your community has grown so massive and there are obviously a lot of people out there who want to continue to hear what you have to say (myself included!). All I can say is you should try to do what feels right. Maybe you need to take a break, or maybe you should commit only a few hours a week to creating content that makes YOU happy! I want to stay along for the ride, whatever happens! x
ReplyDeletemorerebe.com
Take care of yourself and just relax! Take your time blogging, have fun, and enjoy!
ReplyDeleteI love your blog its awesome but I think we all can go a bit insane sometimes from the obsession of blogging as it is addictive and everyone deserves a break now and again. True subscribers / readers will always be there even if you take a break once in a while. It also makes you a better blogger as you then come back with fresh eyes and ideas!
ReplyDeletewww.mybeautysleuth.com
There is a name for my suffering!!! It's a Blogger Breakdown-- all along I thought I was just going insane and needed serotonin. Ugh. I've been under the weather, can't think straight, don't have anything good and/or funny to say. Everyone else seems so interesting and so witty. Hang in there!! (I'll try to hang in there too, with you!)
ReplyDeleteHey love,
ReplyDeleteI will always be here for the ride. Ever since I found your blog, it has become something I check every time I log on. Your research and dedication has made you one of my role models. Try and take a step back and do it for why it makes you happy. Sometimes I get so angry or frustrated at people attacking me, but look--everyone is different and you can't please 'em all. But look at all the lovely people above who left you love---we all love you. So keep shining.
I loved how honest you were in this post! I think parts of it everyone can relate to in someway! Hopefully getting it off your chest will help ease how you're feeling about everything! I love your blog & all the time you put into your posts & comments & replies!
ReplyDeleteI'm with you - for me, blogging is a hobby, and is SO personal. I always wonder why I don't get triple figure likes, or reposts, shares, retweets.. some people make it seem so effortless!
ReplyDeleteBut what is success for you? Clicks, comments, shares.. when does it all end?!
I don't think I can add anything that hasn't already been said so well above, but I do think it's okay to take a break. We get vacation days at work (usually) for a reason… you can take a break every now and then to rest and recharge your blogging brain too. You put out quality content on a frequent basis, and that's a LOT of work! Plus you're incredibly active on social media. You are definitely appreciated, and if someone disrespects you or your work, then they obviously don't belong here because they don't know what they're talking about.
ReplyDeleteI have definitely been down this road not once but many times. It always hits me every end of the year when I realized that I have been blogging over at my other blog for more than 3 years and yet still haven't reached a thousand plus followers and I often wonder how other bloggers are able to do it. But hey hang in there, blogger breakdown usually goes away after you've had some me time away from blogging. Not being able to blog for a few days, a few weeks after having a blogging breakdown my passion for blogging visits me and I no longer pressure myself to have the best post out there, just post what's in my thoughts and I hope that someone out there at least enjoys reading that post. I hope you are ok and I want you to know that I love your blog, despite my here again off again from the blogosphere and whenever I get back to blogging I always do check out your blog! Take care sweetie! =)
ReplyDeleteHugs hun, I don't like seeing you stressed out. You're burned out and that's understandable especially looking at how much hard work you put into your blog. Maybe step back a little, take a break and chill for a bit? Love ya, love ya work and I'm here for the ride!
ReplyDeleteI totally feel ya on this one. Sometimes I think I may switch to only blogging 4 days a week just to save a little bit of stress! Before having a blog, I had no idea how people who blogged for a full time filled their day. Now, I know I could easily do the same if I only had the time! Blogging is so much work and most people don't read the post / just scroll to comment and say "Great post! lets follow each other" (Sorry that is the most annoying thing ever and all I want to do is reply to them and say of course you can follow me, the button is right there! hahah. ) Keep your head up! I love visiting your blog and so appreciate all you do!
ReplyDeletewww.amemoryofus.blogspot.com
Oh babe, I know exactly where you're coming from- and you're so right, we're "not supposed" to talk about it. But I'm proud of you for speaking up and speaking your mind.
ReplyDeleteYour blog is awesome- and I know I personally trust your reviews (I've bought soooo many products after reading your thorough, well-researched reviews), and I'm sure the majority of your followers feel the same way.
Unfortunately, we exist/blog in a "comment for comment/promo for promo" culture, where so many bloggers just swing through to drop a comment and get you to follow them/comment back. It's shallow, and it feels really disingenuous when you never, ever hear from those bloggers again. I'm with you! I hear you! Amen, preach it.
Just know there are a lot of us who feel the same way sometimes, and even MORE who support you + love your blog. Keep doing you, girl. :)
-Ashley
http://lestylorouge.com
theres nothing wrong with taking a break, finding new inspirations, and then coming back!
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MOSAMUSE
www.MOSAMUSE.com
Girl, I totally feel you. I've been in a blogger "rut" the last couple of weeks just feeling really overwhelmed and like I can't get on top of ANYthing! It's so frustrating. Hang in there because SO many people obviously love what you're doing and will always be here for you!
ReplyDeleteElle! I mean this in the nicest way possible, but...you're a perfectionist, aren't you? You've got to let things be and go back to just enjoying blogging. It's great that you want the blog to become a big thing. I think you're failing to see how well you've done already! As for the negative comments, you have to look at it realistically. Anything that becomes popular is going to have people saying something negative about it...out of jealousy, mostly! Look at all those movie stars and how much negativity they deal with in their life! You can't expect blogging to be perfect, and you can't expect YOU to be perfect. Just keep being Elle. We all like her (even the haters like you, because they're just really jealous!)
ReplyDeleteI think that you should blog because you really love doing that, because it makes you smile with lot of e-friends <3 Take with you the best part of this journey and let the bad things go... Continue! Your blog is positive and awesome!
ReplyDeleteXxx boo
Carolina
www.theworldc.com
Aww, girl, I'm sorry you're going through a blogging season like this. I've actually never faced most of the comment problems you've been having, though of course there's the ever present "I didn't read your blog I just want you to follow mine" comments. I love blogging, too. I love it. The writing and the creativity involved are so fun for me. But for me, balance is also important. My personal rule is that I don't get on my computer when there are friends and family around to hang out with because I really need to put them first. And sometimes, because of that, I'm not the best at replying to emails, or I don't get a blog post written when I wanted to...but I'm okay with that. "Real" people have to come first for me--even though I know how much time blogging takes!
ReplyDeleteOh Elle, I'm so sorry you feel like this. I think it's so easy to get caught up looking at other people's blogs/likes/comments/results and compare them to yours but really, a. it all kinda means nothing and b. I had someone tell me recently that she has been reading my blog since inception and is not on any social media nor has she ever commented. I think there's lots of those.
ReplyDeleteKeep doing what you're doing. I for one, think you're great. {and I often don't comment! you see! lol}
The most important part of blogging is always focusing on YOU and your own personal development. Each day, week and month should be about surpassing your previous level, not in comparison to others. All passionate and truly motivated bloggers go through this exact moment and it is nothing to be ashamed of. I try to be conscious of making sure I am living in the moment (not just documenting/photographing it.) You're doing a wonderful job, keep up the great work xo
ReplyDeleteBut this is exactly why I love you! You are so honest and so real! Nothing fake here and that is why I can trust your opinion. I also hate it when I get comments and I know exactly the person did not even bother to read portions of my post. But I also have to say I am not commenting back on their blogs if I see that- then it is their loss too. I also feel sometimes stressed out for all what I feel like I have to do- all that social media, commenting. Sometimes I feel like the real blogging of a post is the tiniest thing of all. But like you say: I do not really have to. I only think I need to. So that is why at least once a week I do not turn on the computer and do not go on my iphone to check anything. The next day I am way more relaxed. Keep up the good work and don´t let anyone stress you out my dear! Love you!!! BTW if you are around Sarasota, I would love to meet up for a coffee! Don´t be scared! I am nice! :-) XOXO, Sissi
ReplyDeleteYou are so not alone. I'm going through something similar - I am feeling really overwhelmed and stressed, and mostly like I can never EVER relax. I absolutely love blogging, much more than my real job or schoolwork, but it's really becoming a lot for me right now. So I completely understand and feel your pain. I wish I could offer advice, but I haven't found the answer myself yet. But I do stand by you 100% and I will be here reading!
ReplyDeletewhenever things become too much for me, i step back. i didn't say stop. i said, step back... slow down. last year i blogged 5 days a week. by the end of the year i was exhausted. this year, i've blogged 3 times a week. i feel much better. do, what is comfortable for you. do what is healthy. you have to find balance. blogging can easily take over your life and control you if YOU let it. you have to realize, BIG bloggers have people to help them (type, take pictures etc.). They're not doing it all by themselves. so take care of you first. find that happy medium. find what works for YOU.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.averysweetblog.com/
I'm not a big blogger, by any means, but I've felt this. I've felt that anxiety. Especially over the fake comments or being unfollowed. But, I'm a lifestyle blogger. I blog for me. About my life. That's not something everyone will want to read so I have to constantly remind myself that. To be honest, I'm not sure I could handle being a beauty/fashion blogger because I would be worried too much about what others thought. I'm grateful for those who can do it though. So don't let anyone bring you down. You have a wonderful following and people who do care about what you say. Remember, you can't please everyone. If you try to, you'll only get hurt.
ReplyDeleteHaving a blogger breakdown just means you care. I've had several lol but at the end of the day you have to decide what you can and can't handle. If posting daily is too much of a time commitment then you have to accept that.
ReplyDeleteI ignore the "haters" and spammers and focus on those who are truly genuine readers of my blog (like yourself). Comment back, tweet out their post, like an Instagram etc. You can't possibly engage with everyone. You just have to focus on what is humanly possible and let those who complain fall to the way side. In the end, those who are avid readers of your blog will share and help spread the word of the awesome things you post.
Keep up the great work girl :)
I am so sorry you feel this way!! I'm a teacher, and this is my first year. I had a parent pull a child out of my class (I teach Pre-K in a public school) because she thought I wasn't working hard enough to meet her child's needs. That was such a huge blow to my self confidence as a teacher, and it made me question the career path I've worked so hard for. But then I realized that most of the other parents, fellow teachers, and even substitute teachers have told me I'm doing a great job. I can't let one entitled, crazy person ruin me.
ReplyDeleteI don't comment on here a lot, nor on your Facebook or Instagram. But I do read your blog very frequently! And I try to like as much as I can on FB or IG! I personally believe you're doing a great job. My advice would be to do your best, be confident that you ARE doing your best, and don't worry about pleasing every single person. Because you can't. Also, don't let your job interfere with your personal life. I know you love to blog, but family, friends, and loved ones are the most important things in life. As long as you have that, you're doing great.
Oh my goodness. You have just written so eloquently so many of the things that I constantly feel myself! Hang in there girl, I think these types of moods come and go, and soon enough you'll be back to your old self. In the meantime I'd just like to say that I LOVE your blog... and I'm not really big on hair or makeup! I just think you are so sweet and honest and personable that I love coming back. And I just got sucked into a whole bunch of your tutorial videos, which I loved watching! I am now obsessed with purchasing a Naked 3 Palette immediately... :-)
ReplyDeleteOh Elle, I can relate to this on so many levels. You are most certainly not alone! This desire to be relevant in the blogging world is a continual up hill battle. My self esteem shatters every time I see a blogger saying it's their one year blogaversary and noting they have accumulated twice the followers I have in their one year than I have in my five.
ReplyDeleteI feel crushed when my applications for sponsorships get declined. I worry about not being pretty enough or tall enough or stylish enough.
You are right about the important things, we love blogging, we are good enough, and at the end of the day, it's the people in our real lives who matter the most.
Chic on the Cheap
Like my mom used to say "Don't worry about being the best, worry about doing YOUR best". I have to keep that in mind a lot too since although I've been blogging over a year I still feel my blog is just in its baby steps and I get frustrated because it's not growing more quickly. And don't worry about shallow people, or people who just stick around waiting for a giveaway, or people who are just mean because they have too much time on their computer and not enough friends in real life. Trust me I have those too and my blog isn't even that popular. Don't burn yourself out, if you need to take a few days off DO IT! You will come back refreshed and ready to push out blogs that will blow people away. As always I love your blog and thanks for taking the time to read mine <3
ReplyDeleteIt's normal. It happens.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds to me like maybe you should establish some stricter parameters around your blogging time. Set some time limits for yourself. Don't let this thing consume you. Because if you do, it's only a matter of time before you walk away from it completely.
Hang in there girl! I think this has happened to everyone at least once.
ReplyDeleteI've definitely felt like this and I think the best thing I did was take a step back and not post everyday. I also designated specified times during the day to answer emails. Another thought is hiring someone to help you run things behind the scene!
ReplyDeleteIt's good to get it out. I've had breakdowns over my 4 1/2 years of blogging. Stressing out will get you nowhere. You have to do it for you. All of your ideas and product finds are great. I know nothing about beauty, and I've been so thankful for your blog.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.somethingmonumental.com/
I'm so late commenting on this post. I read it when it came out and have felt many of the same emotions. I have so many ideas and just don't have the time to do them when I want to do them (I literally have 30 posts swirling around half done). I think you just need to step back and do what you need to do in steps, make a list, otherwise it does get overwhelming. I think you are handling it like a champ, could you take on an intern? Like to help out a couple of days/weekends/evenings? You are a success story and I think you are doing an amazing job. I adore this blog (and you). As for the haters, I just finished a book that says (when getting a hate comment) that it's basically the equivalent of someone riding by your house and yelling "I hate your yard, your heart must be horrible too!" They don't know you, and you wouldn't listen to them in real life so don't do it online. I loved that because it's true. Hang in there and we all love you!!
ReplyDeleteI think you are just amazing, Elle, and your blog has helped me countless times. Even though I don't get to read it daily anymore and find myself catching up after weeks of not reading, I know that you'll have the best tips and REAL reviews about products. I know I can trust you! Don't let unfollowers or mean commenters get you down. You are doing a phenomenal job! I hope you're feeling less stressed now and know that your blog is a resource for many women, even if they don't always tell you.
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