12.18.2015

That Time I Was Rejected

I originally told this to a friend, who suggested I turn it into a blog post. I hope you like it.



There are a few things I won't discuss on here, like money. I'm making an exception today. It seems you can't discuss blogging without money in the same breath. Not a week goes by that I'm not asked questions about the topic: how did you make money? How much you do make? Can you give me your contacts/tricks/secrets so I can make money on my blog? What do you spend your money on?

Responding makes me uncomfortable and I see that info as private. But I will tell you I earn the most income from sponsored posts. A few months ago I was contacted to write a sponsored post for a brand that I loved. I wrote the post (posts are submitted months in advance for approval) and shared it with a friend, something I don't normally do, but I was so proud of the post. It was my favorite one, and she remarked it was my best post yet. I was also excited because working with this brand, to me, would be a way to prove I had "made it." The money from the post was going to buy presents, pay off a credit card, purchase a camera lens, and a blog design update. I don't share this, but my blogging money goes mostly toward my bills and back into my blog.

But back to the post--as one does with sponsored posts, I excitedly submitted it to be approved by the blogging company, the brand, legal, etc. This takes a week or so. It is not unusual to hear back in a few weeks or to have edits. I don't take edits personally.



A week passes, a month passes, and nothing. When my post deadline passed, I emailed my contact. She said it was still under review. After another week, I received an email with the subject: POST REJECTED.

Rejected? I'd never been rejected like this before. Why didn't they ask for edits? Did they hate it? Why was it rejected? This story that I loved (that one day I might share here) wasn't good enough. If they didn't like the direction of the post, why didn't they say something? I immediately wanted to boycott the brand. Just another crappy thing to happen to me this year. Great.

I was devastated. I hate failing. I hate rejection. I felt like a loser, like I sucked at blogging, something I love SO much and spend a crazy amount of time and money on. But I accepted it, until I saw sponsored posts from others from the brand's campaign. The waves of insecurity and doubt came back.

All pics from today's post are from here.


Instead of wallowing in self-pity, I realized how lucky I was to be considered for the opportunity. How lucky I was to make money at a job I love. How lucky I am in general. I have no reason to complain. I did something that I don't talk about on here--my love for helping others. In fact, typing this out is making me sweat because I don't want to come across as boasting or anything. I took the amount of money I would have made and gave it anonymously to strangers who needed it, like paying off layaway and other stuff.

Some people I know did not react to this news well. I should have given the money to them, someone I know, someone who could use it, they said. I was foolish to spend it because who knows how long this blog thing will last, they said. But you know what? These small gestures made my heart happy, happier than what I was going to spend the money on. Everything happens for a reason.

Change your thinking. Change your world.

Extra Elle:

  • Last day of work until 2016!! I hope today flies by.
  • It's the weekend of parties! Last night, I had a much-needed girls' night out (I shared getting ready on my Snapchat--ellesees). Tonight I have a party and then tomorrow is my party. Any excuse to wear red lipstick, I'll take it. Have a great weekend.
  • DON'T FORGET--My linkup Story Behind the Pic is on the 22nd! Feel free to share some Christmas pics, if you'd like.

53 comments:

  1. Elle, I love this story about how you took something that made you feel awful and turned it into something wonderful for others. I really needed this right about NOW and am keeping this one close to my heart

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  2. thank you for sharing! that's hard to open up about something that truly hurt but you definitely turned it into a good thing - including this post! have a wonderful weekend!

    xoxo cheshire kat

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  3. Rejection is hard but you have the best outlook and attitude! I love that you anonymously helped random strangers in need! I think that is the best feeling when you give back and surprise someone with help and kindness!

    Jill
    Doused In Pink

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  4. Rejection is difficult to deal with but you are so right, it's incredible to even get the opportunity. When you start blogging you don't expect to work with companies, review stuff, or even make any money from it. All of those things are like extra bonuses from a hobby that you already really enjoy.

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  5. You have such a wonderful heart! Thank you so much for sharing this post. I'm sorry you got rejected and I wish they had at least told you why, but I'm glad you were able to grow and learn from it and do something to help others. Have a great last day of work!

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  6. You're so incredible, reject you, their loss!! We all know you Rock gorgeous gal and you're so smart too!!!! May your weekend be Merry and joyous beautiful!!

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  7. For anyone to comment on how you choose to spend your money is just ridiculous! I'm so sorry to hear that your post was rejected...but you handled it like a champ girl! xo, Biana -BlovedBoston

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  8. You are such an amazing person. I think it is wonderful what you did. It's no one's business how you choose to spend YOUR money. I'm sorry that your post was rejected but you handled it so well. You have a great outlook on life.

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  9. Hugs! Good on you for taking something negative and change it into a positive thinking, you're a wonderful person, Elle!

    Shireen | Reflection of Sanity

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  10. It's hard to share personal things like this. On a blog you have the choice about what you put out there and so a blog post like this that might make you feel vulnerable takes a lot of courage. Good for you for making a positive out of a hard situation!

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  11. What a great takeaway from a rejection. You shuold absolutley feel honored to have been considered and ... to bless others with the gifts you gave is truly heartwarming! Merry Christmas Elle!

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  12. Thanks for sharing this Elle! You are really good at what you do, I always think to myself, how is she not blowing up all over the place, her blogs and Youtube videos are always on point, I can really see all the hard work you put in.Thanks for doing what you do!!

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  13. Girl I'm always in awe of how amazing each and every one of your posts are. You can tell how much work, heart, and soul you put into each one and you truly shine! Sending you big *hugs* for sharing this post today, and have an amazing time this weekend with all the holiday fun <3

    Green Fashionista

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  14. Thank you for being true and opening up to us, your readers! Have a great weekend.

    ** If you haven't yet - I'm inviting you to join Love, Beauty Bloggers on facebook. A place for beauty and fashion bloggers from all over the world to promote their latest posts!


    BLOGGED: MAC Retro Matte Liquid Lipcolour for January 2016

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  15. Thank you for sharing this story! And I think that is amazing and generous of you to help others, and to have gave the money to someone who needed it! I can see how others would have reacted badly to that, and that makes me sad because I find that selfish. I always get so happy when I hear about people showing kindness to others like you did! And your blog is amazing- the company who rejected you definitely missed out on not accepting your post!

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  16. There are many sponsored posts that I read, I usually mark as read...but I have read every single one of yours and that says a lot. Their loss though, seriously! I cant believe anyone would comment on how you spent some money though. It is none of their business!!! People can be so ridiculous! I hope you have a great time at your parties this weekend :)

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    Replies
    1. I meant that there aren't many sponsored posts that I read haha oops.

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  17. ... & you never know - maybe they had a limit of posts they needed & just didnt have room for yours - not even anything personal. ... Glad you didnt let it get you down... you do amazing posts lady. Don't sweat no one :)

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  18. Wait, how could someone not react well to what you did?! I think it's wonderful! I'm sorry the post didn't work out. Sometimes I have no idea what brands are looking for, because I've seen some really crappy sponsored posts out there. Your blog is awesome. I may not comment every day, but I read every day and think you have such a sweet, honest, positive voice. And you write well too. :)

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  19. Elle, I've said this before and I'll say it again...so proud of you and how honest you are with your posts. Who knows why these things happen, but maybe, it was for the better, you know? And I agree with the comment above...it's the company's loss. I bookmark your posts a lot of the times for your product recs.

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  20. I'm glad that you shared this story, something similar happened to me with a campaign--sometimes it's hard to wonder what certain brands are looking for especially when you have met all of the criteria asked beforehand, and then see another blogger lacking those points asked for. But, I believe that it all works out in the end when you have gratitude. I love your blog so keep at it, lovely.
    FT Anniversary

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  21. I'm glad you shared the story because I've never talked about it - I simply couldn't find words. It's stressing, it turns off blogging mostly because you can not understand why.
    I personally can't understand how on earth your post can be rejected because you are so good at that (way better than I am really).

    Lyosha
    Inside and Outside Blog
    P.S. I’m hosting great glasses giveaway here check it out!

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  22. I'm sorry you were rejected. I'm sure your post was great. And that's so great of you to donate that money!

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  23. Thanks for being so willing to share! It is TOTALLY their loss! Glad you can move on and realize how amazing you are! It's so much better when we focus on the ACCEPTED emails instead ;)

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  24. It is hard not to take it personal but it could just be they met their quota before you sent it to them. Look on the bright side. Donating to others is always a good thing and selfish of those who want it to go to themselves instead.

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  25. I understand. I've been rejected from many things. I submit posts to websites and get a no thank you. I try to join some companies that do sponsored posts and am told that I need to get more followers on social media. But like you, I focus on the things I DID get.

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  26. Maybe this happened for a reason, maybe you really helped the people you gave that money to... Rejection is hard, especially when its something you work so hard on. It really is hard not to take it personally. I think you did a great thing.

    Carrie
    curlycraftymom.com

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  27. This reminds me of the way I feel whenever I submit an article to an academic journal or my book to an academic press. Only the rejection comes back with about 5-10 pages of notes from your "peers" and sometimes it's helpful but sometimes it's mean and not helpful. And then you feel terrible and stupid for a while, as much as you are trying to not take it personally. So, yeah, I empathize.

    Courtney ~ Sartorial Sidelines

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  28. It is so hard to hear a post get rejected and I always try to not take it personal and just focus on my next goal or step.

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  29. I don't think you should have to justify the money you make. At the end of the day, it's an extremely time consuming job. I think underscoring the fact that it's a job is important. That shouldn't detract from the authenticity of the words or the personality behind the blog.

    You're an entrepreneur. Fortunately, in entrepreneurship, rejection only serves as a good lesson and a spark for the fire. Keep growing and getting stronger. No business knows how long they'll last so this is no different.

    I'm with you that I ultimately need enough to sustain myself and make at least minimum wage with all the hours put in. I always wanted to make as much impact as I could with animal shelters, and unfortunately, I can't make the impact without hustling and making money by working with brands and running ads. At the end of the day, the 12 hour workdays barely cover nominal expenses. It's a tough business to be in, but at least we can say we're working for ourselves with our own authentic voices!

    Style Tomes
    Style Tomes on Instagram

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  30. That's so great that you chose to have a positive outlook on something that was so unpleasant! Being a musician, I can tell you that rejection is something I have gotten to know really well. You definitely have to change your thinking to deal with it. One thing that I have learned is that most of the time the reason you get rejected is something you cannot control and has nothing to do with you or something you did. For example, they could have let too many into that campaign and started having to reject posts, even good ones. They could have been trying to target a different demographic or audience than your readers. Chances are, it probably didn't have anything to do with you anything you did, so don't be too hard on yourself.

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  31. I love your positive attitude! Sometimes (most times) I take rejection personally, but there really is a bigger picture, and a positive attitude helps you see that :)

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  32. I understand where you are coming from Elle. This post made me cry...not in a blogging sense, but I have been rejected so much lately from potential jobs and I feel like my career may never start, but I am blessed to have a family and a home and people who care about me. I think it is amazing that you didn't let you get you down for too long. You are a GREAT writer and a FANTASTIC blogger.

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  33. You are just amazing to turn such a hurtful situation into a positive one. I know what it's like to be rejected in that way, and it really hurts -- especially when other people get the opportunity for no apparent reason. You are so inspiring.

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  34. Elle,I admire you so much. You keep doing you! You're a beautiful person. What you did was kind and rewarding and that's all that matters.

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  35. Great post, Elle! I love that you are so real with your readers. You are an inspiration sweet lady<3

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  36. Thank you for sharing your story Elle. Rejection sucks but I love your perspective and how you decided to help others. The feeling one gets from that is one that cannot be matched.

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  37. Yes to your perspective; yes to your charitable response. Rejection is part of achievement. Nobody flies to the top without experiencing it. Those who have the fortitude to push past rejection, and even learn from it, succeed in life. Thanks for sharing this personal story with us.

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  38. It is bad to be rejected, true, but you are so nice and strong, and I am sure that you will have many other cooperations, with people who really appreciated you! And I know you were not bragging - so, well done for helping others! It's interesting, that is the topic of my Monday's post. If people helped others more... we need this, and you are amazing - the ones who didn't want your post, their loss, be very sure of it!
    DenisesPlanet.com

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  39. I'm so sorry you got rejected - especially with no feedback, that's hard! I don't mind being told no, when I get some things I can try to improve on to prevent it happening again.

    It's wonderful you decided to turn a negative into something so positive though, good for you! :)

    Away From The Blue Blog

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  40. I am so glad you shared this and I am so glad I am not alone. This happened to me and I may or may not have cried. Good for you for being so positive about it!

    xx Kelly
    Sparkles and Shoes

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  41. sometimes, some things are really not meant to be! i bet there are greater things for you! :D

    Have a great week!
    Animated Confessions

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  42. I'm really sorry something you were so proud of and loved was rejected without any explanation. That has to be so hard, especially when you see what did pass muster on other blogs. You have an awesome blog, incredibly detailed testing practices, a great written "voice" and overall, your personality shines through in everything you do. Any PR or brand that doesn't feel thrilled to work with someone of your caliber is missing out in the long run!

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  43. For what it's worth, I think you rock! I've been rejected, too, and it totally sucks. And I think what you did with the money you would have made is amazing! Good things come back, girl.

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  44. What an awesome way to turn the situation around. I love it! :D

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  45. Thanks for sharing this Elle. Some people probably needed to hear this ans know that it is okay to be rejected sometimes because there will be a yes at some point.

    Drea
    naturalledrea.blogspot.com

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  46. I saw this post in my feed reader the other day but had no time to stop by read and comment. I love that you wrote this and from your heart. You always write such kind, well-thought, grateful and wonderful reviews that I have no idea why that company rejected you. I am glad you didn't take it personally though and still turned this into a positive experience. You are great Elle.

    Have a wonderful Holiday week! <3 Ada.

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  47. Rejection is so difficult and there are no words to make you feel better when it happens. Just know that you have so much to be proud of and that it was their loss. I read every day and I consistently see the same names in the comments. You have so many people who support you and love this blog. Keep your head up and keep keepin' on!

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  48. Oh girl, I'm so sorry! That's so strange that they didn't even let you know what they might have wanted different. You are great at what you do! Don't let this get you down! *hugs*

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  49. i can't believe people you know didn't like that you gave your money away.. your money, your choice. i think you handled this wonderfully, much more maturely than most people.
    ps. screw those people for rejecting your post, you're awesome.

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  50. I love how you shifted your thoughts on this, and I'm sorry about rejection. Man, I've SO been there. I love that you made the decision to give money away; few things make me feel better than giving.

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  51. You are so right Elle--changing your mindset can really turn a negative experience into a positive one. I'm sorry you had such a bad experience with this company but I'm so glad some good came out of it!!

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